And the winner is...

I was 5 for 8 on my Oscar scorecard last night.

I saw 9 out of the 10 Oscar nominees for Best Picture. I’ll shamelessly admit I did not see ‘True Grit’ for no other reason than the fact that I loathe Westerns and guarantee I would've been snoozin in the cinema. And unlike a certain friend of mine, theater time is not my usual nap time.

Let’s start with the big award of the night going to “The King’s Speech.” I like Colin Firth; he’s a great actor. But the movie was not at the top of my list of films this year. Sure, I had moments of sympathy watching the struggles of the King’s stutter especially as an instructor of speech, but the empathy with his character was never built and I wasn’t made to feel any type of connection with him. This transition from sympathy to empathy is what divides the average from the best. “The King’s Speech” had its moments where Bonham-Carter offered a witty line or Rush before his time, made us laugh with jokes of nicotine being harmful to the body, but nothing to withstand my respect for an Oscar for Best Actor and certainly not Best Picture.

Like the premise and claim of the Winklevoss twins, “The Social Network” got robbed.

A friend of mine who wasn’t as big of a fan of ‘The Social Network” as me, made the comment, “it’s not hard to play an asshole.” However, Eisenberg’s character transcends this simple label and he is much more multi-faceted than this. He’s a genius. He’s a co-ed. He’s seeking acceptance. He’s an innovator. And even though he committed what some of us would deem inexcusable acts for forgiveness, I got it.

How often is it where we have a main character that represents the protagonist and antagonist? Heroic in the sorts of having this billion dollar idea that has reshaped the entire way people communicate, build, create, maintain and sever friendships, relationships, and kinships? And in the same body, Eisenberg manifests this carelessness toward those who assisted him in getting to this place. His performance is equal to Zuckerberg’s IQ: Genius (or whatever numerical score would be the equivalent).

It was outstandingly done.

This, plus the UH-MAY-ZING score of “The Social Network” = Best picture. Apparently not for those occupying seats of the “prestigious” academy. I’m curious to know the youngest member that sits on that board.

[I bet if there was a biopic on Alexander Graham Bell, it would’ve won.]

Other noteworthy moments:

-The opening sequence. Where they used the score of 'The Social Network' (just saying) and Alec Baldwin.

-Anne was radiant and could’ve held down the show solo. Too bad James Franco was sneaking herbal refreshments not of the Lipton family, backstage and made us all feel awkward and question why he was there.

-Kirk Douglass probably shouldn’t be presenting awards anymore. Betty White is an exception for Hollywood senior citizens and just because she can, doesn’t mean Kirk can.

-Sandra Bullock always makes me smile and looked fantastic.

-Also fantastic? Halle Berry. What is it that she is drinking, eating and moisturizing in because I need a life’s supply. Maybe the box of girl scout cookies I ate while watching her speak are not the first steps in the direction of the golden goddess. At least the milk the cookies were dipped in was fat free.

-Gwyneth, stop singing. I can’t believe your husband who is a phenomenal musician hasn’t advised you of the same advice if for nothing else, to save himself from embarrassment. I really hope your dream collaboration with Jay Z doesn’t happen. I think Hova would have more sense than that. He already has 99 problems.

-Celine?

-Melissa Leo, I wanted you to win. Your speech sucked though. I know I have no idea what it might be like to win an Oscar, but repeatedly saying “ummmmm” and “uhhhhhh” is not only annoying, but it prolongs the already 180 minute presentation. You’re an actor, improv. Better yet, being nominated allows you to write something down. The animation guys had better speeches.

-It was Natalie’s year. She was magnificent but I was a bit sad she didn’t mention her cast in her acceptance speech.

I long for the days where Cuba Gooding Jr’s feet left the stage in between whoops and hollers of yelling people’s names he wanted to thank. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnCMqr1QRQw.

Where two strapping young boys took home their first Oscar for “Good Will Hunting.” Where Tom Hanks spoke of angels who were victims to AIDs when he won for “Philadelphia.” Where there was this palpable joy felt between actor and audience. Where there was sincere gratitude for what this honor meant.

The show is getting stiff in the voters and the speeches. Throwing a [Winter’s] Bone in there for Sundance and Indie’s sake but not really considering them as victors of the night, is cheap and annoying. Selecting young hosts for the evening doesn’t make the Oscars “young” “hip” and progressive” if the votes don’t echo the product placement.

The needle has been found.

The most amazing thing happened to me today.

I rummaged through the haystack and it wasn't as easy to find as the obvious 1960's needle that pokes through Seattle's skyline. Apparently you can't type "fabulous apartment in my price range and in an ideal location" into your GPS system to lead you to "home." And funny enough, there is no yellow brick road to take you to Oz in the Emerald City.

But I found it anyway without Liza (my GPS voice) or Dorothy.

I found a place to live.

About 5 weeks and 1 day ago, I made a decision to leave my beautiful hometown Portlandia for another city. It’s not that I haven’t enjoyed Portlandia’s company; the times we’ve had together are innumerable and priceless. It’s just that I want to see what else is out there. It’s not you, it’s me. I promise.

[Note: This sign now reads "Portland Oregon" but I have sentimental value with the old way. After all, this reads true for me. Minus the "Old Town."]

This move wasn’t “planned” per se, but the bed bug of moving has been biting me for the last five years ever since I graduated undergrad. And boy is s/he a bitch. Maybe that’s the culprit of my insomnia.

I started looking for jobs elsewhere and a Master’s program fell into my lap. Not to be one to say no to free schooling, I took it.

Two years later, thesis written and defended, I searched nationally as well as locally and was offered a job in a private business in Oregon. Not to be one to say no to good money and benefits in a failing economy, I took it.

When that economy took its toll on my company, I again was on the hunt for a job. That’s when OSU rang like the orange & black fairy it is and asked me to teach. Not to be one to say no to my awesome alma mater (+health care/benefits), I took it despite its required 150 mile commute, 3 days a week.

You see where this story is going.

In these 4 years where I kept Oregon as my home, I’ve scratched at said bug with an inordinate amount of travel. New York x4, Palm Springs, Vegas x3, Disneyland, Boston, Philly, DC for Inauguration, Park City for Sundance x2, Hawaii, Whistler, Cabo, and a couple cruises. But I still come home tossing and turning. [For the record, my bed is incredibly comfortable and free of bed bugs. Maybe not the best of metaphors given that these creatures have become somewhat of an epidemic].

Fast-Forward January 2011. Over a delicious brunch of French toast in Bridgetown, one of my fabulous girlfriends and I were discussing changes and moving as she is moving herself come March. I gave her the same response I’d been giving myself for years, “What about a job? What about money?” She told me to just do it.

I come home from brunch and my roommate informs me that our landlord is in the midst of selling our condo and they want us out sooner than our agreed upon lease and are offering a very nice “incentive.” Well, one of my excuses is nil. There’s the money. Timing, you’re funny.

There was still the whole issue of having employment, the chances of finding employment in an unfriendly job market, and quitting my 2 jobs when most have none. What sense did this make? Apparently enough. Being the planner that I am, I like for things to be predictable or at least have a relative sketch of my foreseeable future. I made the very unsettling decision to move without a job. Enter extreme anxiety.

So Seattle, you’re it. Some refer to Seattle as Portland’s brother city…I wouldn’t dare, as it seems inappropriate to leave one family member for another.

Five weeks and two days later, I’m with JOB and a home. I’ve seen the worst of Seattle and then I walked into my home…apartment number 10 that I saw to be exact. It was the first place I felt it wasn’t necessary to pinch my nose to save my body from communicable diseases it could possibly get from invasive aromas and that I could lay in the middle of my living room and fall asleep there watching Friends. This is imperative.

After gleefully signing a lease and sharing hugs with my mom and granny (my apartment hunters of the day), I called my dad who has been supportive but I also believe to be secretly hoping it doesn’t work out so I’ll stay home.

Dad: Wow, you’ve got a lot done in a month.

Me: Didn’t think I could do it?

Actually, I really didn’t think I could do it but I thought if I kept envisioning it happening, then maybe it would become reality. I never give myself much credit for getting anything accomplished as there are always items running into tomorrow’s planner checklist that I wanted to get done today, but today, I am giddy with delight.

I feel like calling for Penny Lane and yelling, "IT'S ALL HAPPENING!"

Exhale.

Turn, Turn, Turn

"A time to be born, a time to die

A time to plant, a time to reap

I time to kill, a time to heal,

A time to laugh, a time to weep."

I am aware that the Earth is in constant motion. That’s what keeps us on our punctual schedule of making it around the great sun in 365 days; 366 days respectively in a leap year. But even though we are forever moving, there are some times when you can really feel it more than others. It’s kind of the equivalent to a smooth airplane ride where you are traveling around 500 mph, yet you don’t feel the movement until you hit turbulence.

Yes, this is the ideal way to describe life as is right now. Metaphorical turbulence.

Yesterday’s date was February 14^th. But yesterDAY was Valentine’s day. In the socially constructed way of how we view Valentine’s day, I didn’t have an “official” Valentine. In fact, the only rose I received was from atop of my Grandpa’s casket after the military paid a beautiful tribute to his service.

To some, I’ve probably depressed you with the thought of not having a Valentine. To others, I might have depressed you with bringing up death which as the living, we have such a hard time placing. But let me explain the beauty in both.

I am not anti-Valentine or pro-Valentine. Do I think it’s a bit ludicrous to pick one day of the year where you shall spend hard earned income on a loved one over all other days to show them how much you love them? Sure. Do I think it’s nicer to sprinkle these acts of kindness throughout the other 364 days (365 LY)? Of course. But is there anything wrong with having an official day of love? Not really.

If Valentine’s day is considered to be the day we show the ones we love how we adore them through the mediums of chocolate and other disgusting assorted candies (Note: I hate most holiday candy, not Valentine’s specific), why is it romanticized? Shouldn’t we take the teachings of the third grade and take this “opportunity” to show love to those who get us through days on the regular? That is what I deem love to be; helping each other during the normal and abnormal, mundane and extraordinary, 24 hours of passing through the week.

Through the month.

Through the year.

Thank you to those who get me through the Earth’s rotation. On the regular.

And due to unfortunate circumstances of my grandpa’s death, I had the joy of spending the week/weekend preceding the day of love with my family. Granny, my dad’s mom, lost her husband of 34 years (to us, he was "Papa"). That is longer than my lifetime, which to me, sometimes seems longer than it actually is. I cannot possibly imagine all the memories created with a person over that time when I feel overwhelmed just looking at the pictures that represent my short time here.

Let me tell you a little about my granny. She is where I get my sass, stubbornness and strong will. Although, she is one hundred times stronger than I. She had to be. She grew up in the cruel South where the world hadn’t made a place for her and she had to make a life with her brothers and sisters. Literally, create life so they could survive. She is 1 of 14 and spent her young days on the farm, soiling seeds that would allow her family to eat. She claims she is the worst cook of her sisters since she was out in the field; I beg to differ. She is the best cook.

Granny got out of the South. She went to college. She became an RN. She raised 3 biological sons and blended two families when she met Papa, who had 5 children of his own. I tease her for her love of Y & R, which I happily watched with her as a child, her love of denim skirts, and how even after lecturing someone she’ll kindly say, “bless ya” as if to say, "no harm, no foul, and even if you have transgressed, there's still a chance you're going to heaven." She teases me because of my will in making words up in Boggle that I persistently persuade her really exist, but mostly she supports me, talks to anyone that will listen about her eldest granddaughter, encourages me (she’s the main reason I went for my Master’s) and loves me.

She’s good at that.

She has loved and taken care of Papa for as long as I can remember and is the example of the word wife. The fact that I had to watch her on February 14^th bury her Valentine tears my heart apart.

I’m awaiting that love that will tear me apart to lose and bring me incredible fulfillment in its presence, that I’ll never want to have to leave it. I didn’t know it was possible to feel all those things from one person. I have now been a witness.

I come from pretty remarkable roots. Distinct personalities, the biggest hearts I have ever seen and so much love that it's a wonder that the Earth can contain it all. Maybe that’s why Papa had to leave. We really feel when one of us is needed.

On Thursday, our family gathered at Granny’s to be together. My Uncle, my dad’s twin brother, fresh from the plane, walked through the crowd that had accumulated in Granny’s hallways and walked straight through it all to find her sitting next to me on the couch. They embraced and for the first time, I heard Granny cry over her loss. I stood up, maintaining my disposition I was certain, and walked to the spare bedroom where Granny and I watched Y & R and Papa and I watched Westerns and WWF. I sat down, covered my face and let myself feel everything. A moment later, my dad and my brother who was carrying baby Olivia, came into the room.

How did they know?

My brother said, "We love you Auntie Teela" and held up sweet little Olivia’s mouth that was busy in its new favorite pasttime of blowing bubbles, to my cheek for the sloppiest kiss I’d ever received, which coincidentally, was the best kiss I'd ever received.

Forty-Five.

I don’t watch the National Football League, lest one day of the year. So I think it’s safe to say, I’m a pretty big fan.

I don’t pick a team to favor based on their color, location or by recognition of a popular player’s name. I really just don’t care.

I also never watch commercials in my daily TV viewing and part of the beauty of having a DVR is that I no longer have to and can watch regular programming uninterrupted, as it should be seen.

So basically, come Super Bowl Sunday, I find myself in front of the TV watching 4 hours worth of…commercials. With football in between.

To recap, on Super Bowl Sunday I spend the day eating tacos and watching commercials.

Eating tacos, watching commercials and drinking a root beer float.

Okay, floats.

How pathetic. And this year, along with the musical acts, the commercials pretty much sucked. I mean, 'Fast & The Furious 4?' What the hell is going on?

So let’s start at the top.

Lea Michele, I used to like you. Before ‘Glee’ existed, I loved you for ‘Spring Awakening.’ You’re amazing and I listen to that soundtrack frequently. But today, you didn’t sound good and Amber C. Riley or "Mercedes" should’ve gotten the gig instead of you. Sorry Rachel Berry.

Really Christina Aguilera? Besides the fact that I no longer find you relevant (I did not and will not see 'Burlesque' where one can assume you attempt to act but really just want to pull focus to your falsetto), you ruined our national anthem. No, seriously, you did. The rockets don’t come until after the perilous fight, which you omitted entirely. Also, every note mustn’t be drawn out. It gets annoying. Related: The Black Eyed Peas.

What the What happened there? Fergie, you cannot sing and should not attempt to. Had I known there was a contest for halftime show karaoke to ‘Sweet Child Of Mine,” I surely would have entered. I think my ears as well as all other viewers deserve an apology. Where is the love? Will.I.am, waitta call out Obama. I’m sure he was listening and will take your lyric to heart. Also, get rid of your superfluous 'peas' that collectively, have 2 lines over the course of 10 songs. Metaphorically, push them to the side of your plate and when mom isn’t watching, shove them into your napkin then dispose of them in a trash receptacle immediately.

And commercials? There were only a select few of you worth storing into long-term memory. From the shallow pool of talent that there was, one can assume that the economy has tied the strings to company’s pocketbooks and can’t freely drop a mil or 2 for 30 seconds of recognition like the good ole days.

1: The Osbourne & Bieber commercial was awesome. I don’t even recall what it was for (so in a way this is an advertising fail) but, it was hilarious.

“What’s a Bieber?”

“I don’t know, but it looks like a girl.”

2: I really liked the Chrysler Eminem commercial. In fact, I got chills. I’m still not really sure what it was about and why he ended up in a church with a gospel choir, but I like mystery. I liked the first cartoon Eminem commercial as well.

3: Montage of Super Bowl themed sitcom episodes. I heart nostalgia.

4: Pepsi First Date Commercial.

Girl's thoughts: I wonder if he could be the one? I wonder if he'll kiss me? I wonder if he likes me?

Guy's thoughts: Will she sleep with me? Will she sleep with me? Will she sleep with me?

I miss the days of the Clydesdale's. And when Kanye West's 'Power' wasn't the theme music of every new motion picture coming out in the next 6 months.

Oh, and "Glee's" Thriller/Heads Will Roll halftime show, put the Black Eyed Peas to shame.

Imagine a World Without Stories.

At the beginning of every film screening this year at Sundance, there was an image of a square that contained about 100 different miniature lights. Then a voice comes over the speakers:

“Imagine a world without stories.”

Slowly at first, the individual lights are extinguished. Then quicker, until all the lights are gone and the square has faded into complete darkness.

Wow. The first time I saw this, I stopped breathing. I badly needed to get back to Main street where they were giving away free oxygen in Trident flavors thanks to their sponsor, well, Trident. I restarted breathing after I realized I had complete control over this function and that oxygen was in fact everywhere and not only delivered in Ginseng, Mint and some orange flavor. When the unflavored oxygen moved back to my brain, I felt intensely saddened. What a depressing existence it would be without the sharing of our narratives with one another.

Books? Gone.

Films? Extinct.

Songs? Inaudible.

Conversation? Mute.

I don’t want that world and luckily, it isn’t the one I’m spinning in. This life is rich with stories and Sundance brought some amazing ones to me this year on screen, on stage, and on sidewalks and tents, standing in lines.

We all have stories to tell.

The Films.

Like Crazy. This was the first film I watched at the festival and it was outstanding. I had a problem saying it was “the best” because I had yet to see anything else.

This story captured the feelings of two people who fell in love in college but then are split by distance and try to figure out what the first love is and what it means. Is it the end all or are we able to move forward and find love in someone else? The emotion and devotion you give to that first person is raw and brilliant unlike anything else you’ll probably experience. This film captures it. Everything from the angles that the director Drake Doremus situated the camera in, to the quiet stillness in provocative scenes, and the realness of the character’s interaction and dialogue was so relatable to anyone who has ever felt this type of love.

Beautifully done. And Paramount has purchased ‘Like Crazy’ so this story will be available for you to experience as well.

Higher Ground. In retrospect, I am very much the person who believes that everything happens for a reason. And magnificent happenstance brought me to this film.

I had went to another theater hoping to see a different movie only to find out that there were no tickets available. Bummed as I was, I decided I’d go check out ‘Higher Ground’ instead as it was starting soon at another venue.

I’m so thankful choice #1 was sold out.

Vera Farmiga made her directorial debut as well as starring in this film about the wanderlust of spirituality and religion. Farmiga portrays a woman who in the midst of a miraculous event finds faith. She joins a somewhat fundamentalist church with her family and is a convincing believer. We all are well aware that circumstances as they appear to us are not always true reflections. We are not just shown her struggles of faith, but we are embraced in her journey of finding it, losing it, searching for it, longing for it, reaching for it and grasping for it.

Another Happy Day. Sam Levinson is 25 and wrote this movie 3 years ago. Granted, he has some star power in his family (his father is Barry Levinson who directed Sleepers, Rain Man, Good Morning Vietnam among many other titles) he deserves some strong kudos of the emotionally raw places he went in this film.

Levinson captures the story of a family to the highest dysfunctional degree, ridden with drug addiction, divorce, and self-mutilation (and this is only 3 of the characters). They are brought together for a wedding and these vices skyrocket. Levinson goes further than a normal "abnormal" family squabble that we may have witnessed or lived. He makes us uncomfortable in order to tell this story. And it was so important that he did.

The cast is supported by the star power of Demi Moore, Ellen Burstyn and Ellen Barkin, but they are all outshined by young Ezra Miller. Ezra, your performance was flawless. I am anticipating fantastic things for you.

Cedar Rapids. If you have been reading thus far, you may realize the heavy nature of the previous films I’ve watched. And I was feeling the abundance of these themes- relationships with lovers, a higher being and our kin. I needed some comic relief (not that there wasn’t dark humor in its finest in the previous 3). So I decided where else to get a laugh, than taking a trip with Ed Helms to Cedar Rapids.

Helms’ character, Tim Lippe, lives in a small town working for an insurance company when he is given the opportunity to go to Cedar Rapids. This is the trip he’s been waiting for. He arrives to what we would call a 2.5 star motel and thinks he’s in the Four Seasons. Oh, and then he rooms with John C. Reilly. You can see where this is headed. Did I mention they are there for an Insurance conference?

Lucky for you all, you will be able to go to Cedar Rapids come February. The director of this film Miguel Arteta also directed John C Reilly in a movie I love (and was also a Sundance film), 'The Good Girl.'

The People.

I was lucky to have two of my girlfriends travel with me to Park City, but they left on Sunday, leaving me solo until my Monday evening departure.

In our city of residence, we often find it burdensome to exchange a smile or a word with someone whom we are unfamiliar. Maybe it’s because we’re busy, we’d rather be texting someone we do know, or we just don’t find conversation necessary with someone whose ending in our story will most likely come quickly after its greeting.

At Sundance, there is this majestic wonder of a stranger. We’re brought together standing shoulder-to-shoulder in long lines to films we are dying to see (and well worth the freezing wait), smashed together in music or film houses, seated by each other on the theater shuttles and leaning on the bar next to one another waiting for a spirit to warm up in between it all.

On Sunday evening, I had tried to eat at two different restaurants but was unable to without a reservation. At my third restaurant, there was finally hope.

“Table for 1 please.”

“That’ll be about 15 minutes.”

A voice from behind me. “What if we sat together? Would you mind if we shared a table? I’m a table for 1 as well.”

Now we were a table for 2.

At first I was startled. Eat dinner with someone I had never met before? I was never a fan of blind dates. But I do like stories and I’m sure this guy had some and now I had one from this chance encounter.

Jimmy was from LA, he was in Park City for work. He works behind the scenes with the camera. He was filming interviews and red carpet events for the week. We parted ways so I could go see ‘Cedar Rapids’ but later reconnected and next thing you know, I’m in an after-party with my new friend.

Happenstance.

The Music.

Saturday evening, we had bought tickets to see the legendary Roots. I have been a fan of The Roots for years. I’ve seen them in Seattle and Portland many times. They always bring it. This was no exception and maybe even a greater experience as I watched most of the show from about 5 feet away from the stage. It was fun to share that experience with my friends who hadn't seen The Roots and one who wasn't exactly a fan (yet). It's amazing what a live performance can do to you.

I stepped into the music café on Monday expecting to just catch a peek and be on my way. I stayed for an hour and a half and a couple acts.

The first band, ‘The Low Anthem’ had 4 members who after every song, swapped instruments and positions on stage. That depth of talent amazes me for someone who can only play Heart & Soul on the piano. I was in the restroom later and the one woman of the group was waiting in line. I told her how much I enjoyed their music and the uniqueness of their talent. She chatted with me for a few minutes before I exited. They are touring with Iron & Wine this summer so if you are a fan of them, you may want to check out 'The Low Anthem.' Also, they’ll be on Leno February 3^rd.

The other notable act I saw was Tim Myers. When he started playing I was overcome with familiarity. I’ve heard this guy before. Turns out, he is the voice behind my favorite Target commercials. I dug out my iPod and lo and behold, I have him on there.

Happenstance.

This film festival is nuts. Insanely nuts in the best possible way. To borrow words from ‘Feist,’ I feel it all.

The cold, the excitement, the talent. I feel in my element in the mountained walls of Park City.

I am fortunate to add Sundance 2011 to my story.

Highs and Lows

Ted Williams.

My DVR stresses me out. I don't think it has ever been anywhere near full as when it creeps up to 40%, my anxiety forces me to plant my arse down and watch a couple of shows. At this point, it's for the sheer purpose to regulate my breathing and not for the actual pleasure of enjoying my recorded programs. If I don't have the time, I then begin to randomly delete things of the least priority. You know, the things that aren't in your "normal" scheduled recordings but may have looked enticing while browsing Comcast's guide. Since I have the ability to watch everything, I sometimes find myself watching half of it. Except reality television (minus some E!)...and Tyra.

I never thought I would say this, but I'm fortunate to have DVRAnxiety.

It could be worse.

I could have real problems. While some of you that know me may argue that I do indeed have issues (sustained), my body is not invaded by cold nights, starvation and ill hygiene. I have a home, a wonderful one in fact, I eat until my tummy is delighted (and sometimes more) and enjoy a steamy shower when the heart desires.

Ted Williams didn't have this luxury. But he had a gift. A voice that only took one person's ear and generous heart to change Williams' life.

My main squeeze, Jimmy Fallon, had Ted Williams on his show the other night as I was routinely "clearing" my DVR. Who was this random guy standing next to "The Roots" taking us to commercial? I came to find during an ending segment that 2 days ago, Williams was standing on a street corner with a tattered sign of cardboard, begging for some warm food to fill his belly. And now he was on Jimmy Fallon's couch becoming teary-eyed while discussing his first voice-over spot to air this Sunday. When Jimmy asks him how he can be reached, Williams candidly begins to give his phone number, as up until Tuesday, he was homeless. He doesn't just have the luxury to reach over in his bed, grab his laptop and begin to check in on his website.

This story makes me feel lit up inside. It reminds me that there are good-hearted people out there that care and want the best for their fellow Earthly inhabitants. Happiness, just like misery, wants company as well and we should help people light up and rise whenever we can.

View here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ttdjqjbL7E

Jared Loughner.

And you, you remind me how horribly awful human beings can be to one other. And I'm mad that your name is now part of our vernacular.

You murdered a nine year old child among your victims, and that thought alone causes me to dry heave.

And for what? There is no genuine satisfaction one can receive for that, is there? Most likely you'll be clanking your leg chains down the dark abyss of a cement corridor to an ice-cold chair that will sizzle you to your death upon your sitting. I don't know if I necessarily agree with the death penalty as I believe living with the thought of never being able to enjoy a Burgerville cheeseburger and shake or driving down the highway singing the lyrics to what would be a good song without your so-called harmony, would be much more painful. Either way, I somehow want you to rot.

As for the blame on Palin: Yes, Sarah Palin is less than what I would call "smart." I think we are all clear on my feelings about the woman. However, I am also not a conspiracy theorist where I can accurately conclude that because she poorly authored some bad information and put it out to the masses, she is responsible. If you are not familiar, Palin & co. created a map that placed cross hairs (yes, that thing I'm told you see when you look into your gun to accurately place your target) on specific politicians and the state they represented.

Palin placed one of these cross hairs on Gabrielle Giffords and her state of Arizona. Giffords was shot in the head today by Loughner.

We just don't know enough yet.

What we do know is that six families lost their people today and that's where our energies should be focused. The lives of those they had to leave behind too soon will be forever shifted. My heart aches and hopes for you that you will be able to find some peace in what I imagine to be the most tragic of realities. Especially to the family of that little girl who wasn't even given a chance. No first date, no learning how to drive, no college. Nothing. Loughner, you stole this from her. I hope you never enjoy any of the freedoms that we do enjoy, contrary to what you badly articulated.

The Year's Best.

Forget that Ebert fellow.

Forget that silly "Top 20" on your iTunes homepage. I mean, are you really going to trust a list that rotates Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift as the best songs week after week? Come on.

And Oprah's Book Club? That was so last year. [Oprah I didn't mean it, it was nearly a persuasive tactic, I still love you].

In fact, in honor of you, let us take a look at my favorite ThiiiIIIIIIngs of these last 365 days/12 months/8760 hours/525,600 minutes (thanks to 'Rent' I didn't even have to calculate that last one):

The Tunes.

1. 'Dog Days are Over' Florence + The Machine: I was a little late on Florence + The Machine, but when I first saw her, it was during an amazing performance on the Music Television...they were actually playing music and not bad reality television. Her striking red hair should be an indicator of what her voice is capable of, but it isn't. This woman has pipes like no other and her album is appropriately titled "Lungs." Her voice doesn't quit.

"And I never wanted anything from you. Except everything you had and what was left after that. Oh!"

2. 'Sailing to Nowhere' Broken Bells: A collaboration of a local Portland favorite of mine, 'The Shins' and Danger Mouse of 'Gnarls Barkley' fame, I heard this band for the first time toward the end of the year and was pleasantly surprised to see them in concert a few weeks later with a friend of mine with an extra ticket :). They delivered. I love it when you can go to a show and feel the music not just in bass, but in the performance of the musicians. I feel my entire system alter to keep time with this song. I wish it was as lengthy as "Hey Jude" or "American Pie" with just the beat. Oh well, listening to it on repeat works just as well.

"Running in circles, a mouse on the table, I try to feel. I just don't."

3. 'No More' Eminem Feat Lil Wayne: The beat comes from the popular "Haddaway" song made famous from the "A Night at the Roxbury" sketch on SNL. Eminem and Lil Wayne both have such unique voices that breaks up the mundanity that rap can be. It is a bit profane, but they did a clean version on SNL and it was still just as awesome.

"I'm alive again. More alive than I have been in my whole entire life."

4. 'Power' Kanye West: I don't really care for Kanye as a person due to the douchey things that he has done and the ignorant comments he continues to make, but he has a talent. And that is spittin mad lyrics (yes, I just said that). Oh well, guess you can't have it all.

"I'm livin in the 21st century doin something mean to it. Do it better than anybody you ever seen do it."

5. 'Creep' Scala & Kolacny Brothers: If you saw the first trailer for 'The Social Network' this was the song. This is a beautifully haunting cover of Radiohead's classic hit. The 'Brothers' ' outstanding arrangement with the sweet melody of the piano accenting the voices of this all girl's choir will give you chills. The good kind.

"I want to have control. I want a perfect body. I want a perfect soul."

The People (Real & Fictitious).

1. Ty Burrell/Phil Dunphy: If you haven't started watching 'Modern Family' by now, you must hate life and not enjoy laughing. You're probably also the awkward one at work that fake laughs during the coffee cooler conversation. No but seriously, I highly advise that you tune in Wednesday nights. Ty Burrell, who happens to be a native Oregonian, plays the hilarious "cool" dad of a family of 5. You can't help but love him, laugh at him, feel sorry for him and then secretly wish your future husband acts exactly the same way.

2. Jimmy Fallon: My not-so-secret late night crush not only has the best band in late night (The Roots!) but has the best show no doubt. Jimmy captures the true elements of a variety show using his talents in song, humor and athletic competition. I mean, who else can slow jam the news with Brian Williams and challenge Betty White to Beer Pong? That's what's up.

3. Tina Fey/Liz Lemon: If I could have someone else's life, it would probably be Tina Fey's. We already have the same initials, so we're almost there. I admire Fey for her talent first as a writer and secondly, her ability to deliver such written brilliance. What a woman. She deserves all the success.

4. Jon Stewart: I just love listening to him talk. The fact that he's funny when he talks is everything one wants and needs in this life really. Before his book 'Earth,' I hadn't done the whole audiobook thing, but I feel like I had the complete experience listening to him rather than just reading his words. Simply wonderful. I hope I get back to NYC sometime soon so I can go to a taping of 'The Daily Show' again...after my trip to 30 Rock to see Jimmy Fallon and maybe run into TF in the halls. It could happen.

The Films.

1. The Social Network: The first scene of this film is intense, hilarious and awkward, which basically describes it in its entirety. The movie sets Zuckerberg up as the intelligent antagonist who we should be hating but by the end, you are so blown away with Eisenberg's performance that you in fact shamefully, kinda like Zuckerberg.

Take-Aways: Keep your friends close. Your real friends. Not the randoms on Facebook. While you're at it, delete the ones who you are uncertain of who they are and what the origins to your so-called friendship are. If you have to call your friends for confirmation in a conversation that goes something along the lines of, "Was that the guy that sat behind me in Physics?" Do not accept the friend request. We are using the term "friend" a bit loosely.

Oscar Worthy: Jesse Eisenberg, prepare your Best Actor speech. Hopefully they allow more characters than those pesky limited status updates.

2. The Black Swan: I'm still wrestling with what went on in that theater. This film was insane. Unlike other psychological thrillers (ie: Fight Club) where the different characters existence are made clear, this one is not. It leaves the viewer with the opportunity to decide what really occurred and what was only an act of cerebral games.

Take-Aways: Don't lose yourself and transform into a bird. Especially one that looks like it has been covered in oil like that one episode of 'Saved By The Bell' with the oil spill. Poor Becky.

Oscar Worthy: I've forever been a fan of Natalie Portman and I think she brought it. She made us uncomfortable but also created an understanding of the desirous place her insanity came from. Best Actress: Done.

3. The Fighter: This film based on true events shows the solidarity of family...ghetto fabulous family, but kin no less. Micky, the younger of the two brothers, is a struggling boxer with all the pressure on him from his family to be a success. Micky relies on his crackhead brother to train him while his managing-mother's concern for his career seems to be influenced by the fact that Micky supports the family. There's street fights. Jail Time. Some ass kicking.

Take-Aways: If you haven't learned it from Whitney already, crack is whack. Just looking at how unattractive a normally attractive Christian Bale looks when he is simply pretending to be on fake crack, is DARE program enough for me. Just say no.

Oscar Worthy: Bale. Let me preface this with saying, I am not usually the biggest Bale fan in the slightest. But his character Dickey made you feel every emotion from disgust and hate to sadness and joy, which is an incredible task for someone playing a has-been fighter turned crackhead. I hope you pick up your Supporting Actor statue, but spare us from using your creepily annoying 'Batman' voice. Adams might also be looking at Supporting Actress because she was kind of a badass. Go girl.

4. Inception: I already devoted an entire blog to how spectacular this movie is. So read that here: http://relentlessreflection.blogspot.com/2010/07/bravo-nolan-bravo-reflections-on.html

Take-Aways: Don't be content with the wonder or be confused to know if your dream could exist within a dream. Within another dream. Also, purchase a spinning top if you ever need to discriminate between the two. Or three.

Oscar Worthy: I just really want Leo to get an Oscar already. How many Oscar winning movies must one be in before they individually get recognized?! That being said, this wasn't his best performance by any means and if he's against Eisenberg, I'm going to have to go with Jesse. Nolan better go home the gold, no doubt. It was kind of this year's 'Avatar' but Nolan and co. actually created the sets.

5. The Kids Are Alright: Firstly, I must mention that this is a Sundance film which makes me incredibly happy. I love it when a well-written story still is able to be told and well-received, even in the absence of special effects that are implemented by a program on the computer.

Take-Aways: Life is complicated. It's even more complicated when you're a lesbian who used sperm from an anonymous donor and then your child wants to find the sperm responsible for his existence. And then your lesbian mom sleeps with said sperm donor. Wait, why couldn't they just do it the old-fashioned way in the first place if coitus was inevitable?

Oscar Worthy: I'm always in Annette Benning's corner, but she will be beat out by Amy Adams (if nominated) or at least, should be.

And there ya have it. I tell no lies.

Set your DVR, alter that Netflix queue and tell Regal Cinemas I sent you.

Happy New Year, folks!